DEAR DEIDRE: A MARRIED friend has asked me if I’m interested in no-strings sex.
I was widowed two years ago and am really missing intimacy and affection, so I’m really tempted.
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I crave affection but know my husband wouldn’t have wanted me to find anyone else so soon – although I hope he would have been happy if it was with his friend.
This friend is 47 and I am 44. I went to see him last week and got upset, as I usually do. He sat and hugged me like my husband used to. We chatted and it was lovely being held. We talked about the things I miss in a relationship.
I told him I enjoyed our cuddle and he said he did too. He wanted it to go further, but just as friends. He loves his wife but needs to fulfil his sexual needs. I’m sexually frustrated and lonely.
Would I be treading on dangerous ground if I agreed to this arrangement?
DEIDRE SAYS: Don’t go there. He has a wife so has no business to suggest having sex with you. Tell him you value his support but people who are friends don’t have sex because it muddles all sorts of boundaries and ends up with hurt feelings.
My support pack Your Lover Not Free will help you to think this through. I’m afraid you’re kidding yourself that your husband would approve of this arrangement.
Your husband’s life has ended but yours has not. You deserve to find happiness again, but steer clear of your married friend.
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