My fiancé almost broke off our engagement because my family takes up all my time

DEAR DEIDRE: MY fiancé almost broke off our engagement because he is so fed up with my family taking up all my time.

I am 43, he is 47, and we met four years ago.

We love each other but my disabled mum and younger brother live with me and neither do anything for themselves.

Mum is 65 and very overweight, with problems walking and has diabetes.

My brother is 36, has been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, and sits on his laptop playing games all day.

Whenever I go round to my fiancé’s house, they phone asking me to do something.

My fiancé got so angry about it one day he said he was dating someone else.

We made up but he wants me to stand up to my family.

Mum is sulking over it but why can’t I have a life?

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DEIDRE SAYS: You can – but you have to break your relatives’ habit of depending on you.

Go to live at your fiancé’s house and visit your mum and brother once a day.

Your brother can shop and wash and cook for them. It might help lift his mood to feel useful.

Find reassurance through Carers UK (, 0808 808 7777).

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