Now we’re a couple but can I trust him to change his spots and be the man I need him to be? I crave honesty and security.

He’s desperate for us to get married and I know he has enough money put by to give us both a decent life, but something keeps niggling in the back of my mind.

He makes no secret of the fact that he attended wild orgies and mad parties as a younger man. But he’s thoughtful and gentle in bed with me.

The few people I’ve told about our relationship have all warned me off him.

They say that he sounds like a nightmare and that I’d be mad to get more involved with someone like that. Would I?

JANE SAYS: It’s your life and you must do what makes you happy. Does this man lift your spirits and make your heart sing? Does he treat you well?

My fear is that he is something of an opportunist. For years he’s lived his life by his own set of rules; he’s flown around the globe pleasing himself first.

Three children have a self-confessed, selfish father. Does that sit well with you? Does he plan to be a better father in future?

It can’t have escaped his notice that your nursing skills may come in very handy again in the future, especially if he has another accident or his high living finally catches up with him.

I do think you need to keep your eyes and ears open and your wits about you.

I suggest you take one day at a time. Enjoy the dates and the romance and just see what happens along the line.

Don’t make any promises that you may later come to regret.

If he is a professional charmer, then he could be dangerous, so don’t invest (cash or emotions) until you’re absolutely sure about what you’re dealing with.

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